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The People v. Abraham of Hebron - a radio play

Abraham of Hebron
King Shinab of Admah
Lot of Zoar
Eliezer of Damascus
Defence Counsel
Dr. David


BAILIFF: The Court of Mundus is now in session, all rise.

All rise.

BAILIFF: Be seated.

All sit.

JUDGE: What's the case?

CLERK: Today's case is the People v. Abraham of Hebron, Your Honour. The defendant is charged with attempted murder, child abuse, pandering, slavery, displacement, abandonment, incest and grievous bodily harm with intent.

JUDGE: How does the defendant plead?

DEFENCE: My client pleads not guilty, Your Honour.

JUDGE : Your opening statements, please.

PROSECUTOR: Your Honour, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this trial will show that the man you see before you is a vicious beast lacking any moral standards and human emotions, and that he must be locked away for the rest of his life, without chance of parole, for the safety of humankind.

It will be proved that the defendant is guilty of attempted murder, child abuse, slavery, pandering, incest, genital mutilation, displacement and abandonment.

Until her death, he was married to his half-sister Sarah. Being rich, they also purchased a lot of slaves from traffickers. As an old man, and being afraid he may not have an heir, he first started hearing voices that promised him he'd father nations, and which gave him bizarre orders. On two counts, he was told to go into exile where he pimped out his wife to the respective rulers. Another time the voice told him to cut off the foreskin of all male family members, servants and slaves.

Since Sarah didn't seem to be able to bear children, she loaned him her slave Hagar for that purpose. The two had a son who was called Ishmael.
Abraham grew very attached to the boy, but after some years Sarah, too, gave birth to a son and insisted that Abraham send Hagar and Ishmael out into the desert, which he did.

As Isaac grew up, his father heard the voices again, telling him to sacrifice his son. Without hesitation he brought Isaac to the altar, and when the boy asked about the sacrifice, Abraham told him it would be provided by their god. When they arrived at the altar, he tied Isaac up, threw him on it and commenced to cut his throat. At that moment he spotted a ram that was caught in the bushes, came to his senses and sacrificed the ram instead. - Without this coincidence, Isaac wouldn't be here today.

And unfortunately this man's actions do not stand alone: Abraham has convinced others of the voices, conspired with them to corrupt public morals and created religions with billions of followers who teach the distorted and evil views of this monster as facts. The results have been countless occurrences of genocide, warfare, homicide, child abuse, torture, slavery and racism, to name but a few.

On top of this, he has promised his descendents a country that wasn't his to give, and thereby has created a permanent war that lasts until this day.

I have no doubt, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that at the end of this trial you will see this man as the deluded misanthropic villain that he is, find him guilty as charged and make sure he won't cause any more harm to the world than he already has. Thank you.

JUDGE: Defence?

DEFENCE: Your Honour, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, you may wonder, just like I do, why we are here today. Before you stands the very man who created human civilisation as we know it by obeying God and setting down His law as the moral code for society that stands today as it stood back then. Without Abraham of Hebron, we would all be living in anarchy, in a godless world without morals and ethics in which everybody would do as he pleases, without any consideration for others.

The charges against the defendant relate to events that date back to a time where law and order had not been established, and nobody can be sentenced for actions that were not covered by any laws at the time they occurred.

Marriage amongst siblings and slavery were common practice in those days, and we cannot blame the defendant for living at that time. As for sacrificing Isaac, even human sacrifices were common in those days - and after all, did God not stop him in due time? It might have been a little shock for the boy when his father attempted to cut his throat, but what is that compared to the strength and reassurance Abraham's example of obedience gives to every believer in the world?

Ladies and gentlemen, I am confident that at the end of this trial you will see that Abraham did everything God asked him to do, that he has not broken any laws of those times, and that you will find him not guilty of any wrongdoing, neither morally nor in the eyes of the law. Thank you.

JUDGE: Prosecution?

PROSECUTOR: Abraham, when your father died, you were an old man already, and your wife was an old woman. She appeared to be barren, and you feared never to have a son to leave your estate to. Is that correct?


PROSECUTOR: And in those days you first heard the voices telling you that you'd become the father of multitudes. Is that true?

ABRAHAM: God promised me, that is true.

PROSECUTOR: How do you know that it was God's voice?

ABRAHAM: When the Lord speaks to you, you just know.

PROSECUTOR: You just know...

Abraham, is it true that your wife was also your half-sister?


PROSECUTOR: Did you keep slaves?

ABRAHAM: Yes. It is the perfect right of every free man to purchase slaves.

PROSECUTOR: Were there any laws in place against incest and slavery?

ABRAHAM: No. I was autonomous and didn't have to answer to anyone. I made my own laws.

PROSECUTOR: I call my first witness, King Shinab of Admah.

CLERK: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?


PROSECUTOR: King Shinab, which country did you rule at the time?

SHINAB: The country of Admah.

PROSECUTOR: Was Hebron a part of that country?

SHINAB: Yes, it was.

PROSECUTOR: When Abraham lived in Hebron, was he your subject?

SHINAB: Yes, he was.

PROSECUTOR: He never indicated to be under the rule of a king.

SHINAB: In those days, the known world was divided already, and every scrap of land was part of a kingdom.

PROSECUTOR: Did Abraham ever indicate that he did not accept your authority over him?

SHINAB: Not at all. He obeyed my orders, he paid his taxes, and he gave me his men when there were wars to fight.

PROSECUTOR: Did you have laws against slavery and incest in those days?

SHINAB: Yes, both slavery and incest were strictly forbidden.

PROSECUTOR: Was the defendant aware of these laws?

SHINAB: Yes, he was. We had quite a few heated discussions about this.

PROSECUTOR: Were those laws ever enforced in Hebron?

SHINAB: No, they weren't.


SHINAB: Abraham was a rich and influential man, and if we had tried to take his sister or his slaves from him, he would have left the kingdom with all his wealth. We couldn't afford that.

PROSECUTOR: Were incest and slavery common in other kingdoms?

SHINAB: To a certain degree.

PROSECUTOR: Why did you ban them?

SHINAB: Incest was banned because it was obvious that members of inbred families were very inclined to retardation and madness.

Slavery was banned because in my opinion it shows complete disrespect for mankind to treat a human being as property.

PROSECUTOR: Your witness.

DEFENCE: King Shinab, Abraham never mentioned any monarch or authority ruling over him, apart from the divine one. Can you prove that he was one of your subjects?

SHINAB: I can. Here is the papyrus with his declaration of loyalty to me which he signed before he was allowed to settle in Hebron.

SPECTATOR: Probably with XXX.



JUDGE: Order in the court!

Bailiff, will you show this to the defendant please?

Is that your signature?

ABRAHAM (quiet): Yes.

JUDGE: Bailiff, will you present this to the jury, please?

DEFENCE: King Shinab, at the battle of Siddim, Abraham assisted you and your allies, the kings of Sodom, Gomorrah, Zoar and Zeboyim. When he won the battle and restored all captives and all properties from Sodom and Gomorrah, the king of Sodom offered him to take his share from his property. Is that not a rather unusual offer to someone who is not an ally himself but rather the subject of an ally?

SHINAB: Not at all. On this occasion, Abraham had taken the initiative after hearing that his nephew Lot had been captured. And even though his motives were personal, the war could not have been won without him.

DEFENCE: It was more of a successful revolt than a war, was it not? Was it not your own Emperor Chedorlaomer you were fighting against?

PPOSECUTION: Objection, this is immaterial.

JUDGE: Objection sustained.

DEFENCE: No further questions.

PROSECUTOR: Abraham, before you moved to Hebron, you were living in Canaan until it was struck by a famine. Where did you go from there?

ABRAHAM: I went to Egypt with my nephew Lot and all my possessions.

PROSECUTOR: Does the term possessions also include your wife and slaves?

ABRAHAM: Of course.

PROSECUTOR: When you introduced your wife to Egyptians, who did you tell them she was?

ABRAHAM: My sister.

PROSECUTOR: Despite the fact that it is the truth, why did you withhold the fact that she was your wife?

ABRAHAM: She was a very attractive woman, and I was afraid I'd be killed over her.

PROSECUTOR: You were afraid someone might fall for your beautiful sixty-five year old wife, and so you gave the impression that she was still available?


PROSECUTOR: Did you encourage others to court her?

ABRAHAM: Of course not, but I could hardly prevent them from it, either.

PROSECUTOR: Eventually the pharaoh heard of her beauty and added her to his harem, rewarding you with a large amount of cattle and slaves. Is that correct?


PROSECUTOR: What happened then?

ABRAHAM: God punished the pharaoh with several plagues.

PROSECUTOR: He punished the pharaoh? But sure, he didn't know she was married.

ABRAHAM: You don't have to be aware of your guilt to be punished by God.

PROSECUTOR: What happened after that?

ABRAHAM: Sarah finally admitted that I was her husband, and that the plagues were the Lord's punishment. The pharaoh got upset and ordered us to leave Egypt.

PROSECUTOR: But he allowed you to keep his presents, didn't he?

ABRAHAM: Yes, he did.

PROSECUTOR: Twenty-five years later you went into exile again, this time to Gerar. Is it true that once again you introduced Sarah as your sister for the aforementioned reasons?


PROSECUTOR: This time she was married to King Abimelech, wasn't she?


PROSECUTOR: Did he pay you for her?


PROSECUTOR: With what?

ABRAHAM: The usual, cattle and slaves.

PROSECUTOR: When you say 'the usual', does this imply there were more occasions when you pandered your wife?


PROSECUTOR: Were there other occasions when you gave your wife to others?

ABRAHAM: Not that I can remember.

PROSECUTOR: When Sarah was convinced she couldn't give you a son, what did she suggest?

ABRAHAM: She gave me one of her slaves.

PROSECUTOR: Hagar, the Egyptian slave, got pregnant. How was the relationship between the two women?

ABRAHAM: Very tense. My wife was terribly jealous, and Hagar developed an attitude of self-importance which is completely unbefitting for a slave.

PROSECUTOR: What did you do?

ABRAHAM: I returned her to Sarah and told her to do with her as she pleases.

PROSECUTOR: And what was it your wife did to her?

ABRAHAM: She beat her, kicked her and whipped her.

PROSECUTOR: On a regular basis?


PROSECUTOR: Do you think she tried to kill her, or her unborn child, or even both of them?

ABRAHAM: I'm not sure. (after a short pause) Possibly.

PROSECUTOR: What did Hagar do?

ABRAHAM: She ran away, but she came back the next day.

PROSECUTOR: She had nowhere else to go, had she? The only places she could reach by foot were Sodom and Gomorrah, where everybody knew you and would expect a generous ransom for her return. Isn't that right?

ABRAHAM: It was God who sent her back.

PROSECUTOR: Of course.

So Hagar gave birth to a son you called Ishmael. How was your relationship with him?

ABRAHAM: Wonderful. He was very bright and lively, although a little unruly at times. I loved him.

PROSECUTOR: But thirteen years later Sarah became pregnant herself, didn't she?


PROSECUTOR: After you moved to Gerar and she gave birth to Isaac, what was her attitude towards Ishmael?

ABRAHAM: She was uneasy because she feared he might inherit my estate instead of Isaac.

PROSECUTOR: What did she ask you to do?

ABRAHAM: She told me to send Ishmael and his mother into the desert.

PROSECUTOR: And you did?


PROSECUTOR: You don't strike me as the type of man who takes orders from his wife.

ABRAHAM: God told me to listen to her.

PROSECUTOR: Oh, right. You gave them provisions?

ABRAHAM: Yes, a container of water and food.

PROSECUTOR: How long would these provisions have lasted them?

ABRAHAM: Two days, maybe three.

PROSECUTOR: Let me get this straight: you sent a mother and your teenage son into the desert, with no settlement around for several days, with no guidance as to where to go, and provisions for two days?

ABRAHAM: I had to.

PROSECUTOR: You had to...

Abraham, shortly before the birth of Isaac the voices told you to perform a certain ritual with all males in your household. What kind of ritual was that?

ABRAHAM: God asked me to remove the foreskins of all men in my household, including myself and my sons, as a sign of our covenant. For every newborn male this had to be carried out on the eighth day after his birth.

PROSECUTOR: Did you give your servants a choice to leave?

ABRAHAM: They were slaves.

PROSECUTOR: Can I take that as a no?

ABRAHAM: You most certainly can!

PROSECUTOR: How many died after the procedure?

ABRAHAM: Not many.


ABRAHAM: Maybe thirty or forty.

PROSECUTOR: After you had displaced Ishmael, did you ever think about him?

ABRAHAM: Quite a lot. After all, he was my firstborn.

PROSECUTOR: How was your relationship with Isaac?

ABRAHAM: We got on all right.

PROSECUTOR: Were there any feelings of resentment towards him because he was the reason for abandoning Ishmael?

ABRAHAM (after a pause): No.

PROSECUTOR: The next time you heard the voices, what did they tell you to do?

ABRAHAM: God told me to sacrifice my only son.

PROSECUTOR: Your only son?


PROSECUTOR: How many sons did you have altogether?

ABRAHAM: Two at that time. After Sarah died, I remarried and had a few more with my second wife and my concubines.

PROSECUTOR: You had two sons at the time. So whom were the voices referring to as 'your only son'?

ABRAHAM: Isaac, of course.

PROSECUTOR: So the voices didn't know about Ishmael?

ABRAHAM: Of course the Lord knew about Ishmael.

PROSECUTOR: So why didn't he count him?

ABRAHAM: I suppose because he wasn't part of the family any more.

PROSECUTOR: After you were told to sacrifice your only son, what did you do?

ABRAHAM: I got up the next morning and took Isaac and two servants into the mountains. We gathered firewood, and I left the servants behind and climbed the mountain with Isaac.

PROSECUTOR: Did you tell him who the sacrifice was?

ABRAHAM: Of course not. If he had known that, he would have put up a fight.

PROSECUTOR: That's understandable. Some children who are told by their voices-hearing fathers that they are to be butchered in order to appease an invisible creature might indeed put up a fight.

How did you feel?

ABRAHAM: I didn't feel anything.

PROSECUTOR: You must have felt something. Was it sorrow, pity, shame, guilt, pride, satisfaction...

ABRAHAM: Pride, I guess. I was doing the Lord's work and wouldn't let anything get in my way.

PROSECUTOR: Was Isaac not suspicious when you didn't bring a sacrificial animal?

ABRAHAM: He was, but I told him that God would provide it.

PROSECUTOR: What happened on the top of the mountain?

ABRAHAM: I built an altar, laid out the wood, tied Isaac, threw him on the altar and was about to cut his throat when an angel of the Lord shouted from the heavens, 'Stop! Don't kill the boy! For now I know that you would not withhold your only son from me, and I will multiply your descendents beyond number.'
It turned out that this was just a test of my faith. Then I looked around and spotted a ram who was stuck in the bushes, and we burnt him as an offering instead.

PROSECUTOR: Just a test? So your god wasn't sure whether you'd be willing to murder Isaac or not?

ABRAHAM: Of course he knew.

PROSECUTOR: Did you feel any remorse or guilt for trying to kill your son?

ABRAHAM: Of course not, I had no reason to. I only followed orders.

PROSECUTOR: Did all this take still place on your own land?

ABRAHAM: No, we were far away from our home.

PROSECUTOR: So it was somebody else's ram you sacrificed?

ABRAHAM: God had sent it, so it wasn't anybody's.

PROSECUTOR: I call Isaac to the stand.

CLERK: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

ISAAC: I do.

PROSECUTOR: Isaac, when your father brought you up that mountain, what happened?

ISAAC: He built an altar and laid out the firewood. Then, out of the blue, he grabbed me, tied me and threw me on the altar. He pulled out his knife, jumped on top of me and held it to my throat.

PROSECUTOR: What did he look like?

ISAAC (after a pause): Mad.

PROSECUTOR: When he put the knife to your throat, did anybody shout 'Stop!'?

ISAAC: Yes. I did.

PROSECUTOR: I see. Did you hear or see anybody else on the mountain apart from your father and yourself?


PROSECUTOR: After you shouted 'Stop', what happened?

ISAAC: I spotted a ram which was stuck in the thicket and pointed it out to my father.

PROSECUTOR: How did your father react?

ISAAC: He looked like he woke up from something and then agreed to sacrifice the ram instead.

PROSECUTOR: How has this event affected your relationship to your father?

ISAAC: I tried to make sure I wasn't left on my own with him from that time, but of course there still were occasions when I was. To this day, I still wake up screaming because I feel my father's knife at my throat.

PROSECUTOR: Your witness.

DEFENCE: Isaac, you worship the same god as your father does, don't you?

ISAAC: Of course I do, otherwise he'd kill me.

DEFENCE: Your father has been blessed by God, and without him and his example we would not have the religions that have raised mankind from anarchy and immorality to ethical and compassionate human beings. Surely you are not going to tell me that you don't believe in God?

ISAAC: I didn't say that.

DEFENCE: Good. As a believer in God, don't you think that your ordeal, traumatic as it may be, has been part of the divine master plan to set an example for all those whose trust in God starts to faint and make sure of their salvation?

ISAAC: I didn't say I believed, either.

DEFENCE: Then what do you believe?

ISAAC: I can't say. You see, the entire family is forced to believe and pray and worship and sacrifice the way he tells us, and you have no idea what he does to those who as much as raise a question...

DEFENCE: So you don't believe?

ISAAC (close to tears): I really don't want to talk about this...

PROSECUTOR: Objection, the witness' belief is not relevant to the case.

JUDGE: Objection sustained.

DEFENCE: No further questions.

PROSECUTION: Abraham, while you resided at Hebron, you were visited by three men, supposedly two angels and your god himself, who told you about his plans to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah. Is that correct?


PROSECUTION: How did you react?

ABRAHAM: I pleaded on behalf of the cities.

PROSECUTION: You haggled with your god?


PROSECUTION: So you negotiated with him when it came to the lives of your friends and business partners in Sodom and Gomorrah, but when you were told to sacrifice your own son, you didn't even try?

ABRAHAM: On the first occasion, he informed me of his plan. On the other occasion, he gave me an order.

PROSECUTION: You claim your god is omniscient, don't you?

ABRAHAM (after a few seconds): What?

PROSECUTION: You say he knows everything, don't you?

ABRAHAM: Of course he does.

PROSECUTION: Then how could you think you'd be able to make him change his mind?

ABRAHAM: Of course he would have known beforehand that he would spare the cities, I thought maybe he only wanted to see whether I'd dare asking him for it.

PROSECUTION: So you considered he was lying to you.

ABRAHAM (shouting): God never lies!

PROSECUTION: But then you should have known that he wasn't able to spare the cities, shouldn't you?

ABRAHAM: God can do anything he wants!

PROSECUTION: But if he were able to change his mind, he couldn't be omniscient, because in that case he would have known the outcome already, wouldn't he?

ABRAHAM: Can I have a glass of water?

PROSECUTOR: I call my next witness, psychiatrist Dr. David.

CLERK: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

DR. DAVID: I do.

PROSECUTOR: Dr. David, you have examined the defendant. What is your diagnosis?

DR. DAVID I have diagnosed the defendant with chronic schizophrenia.

PROSECUTOR: Why did you reach this conclusion?

DR. DAVID: The defendant suffers from auditory hallucinations. These usually begin after a traumatic event, such as the loss of a family member. In Abraham's case, the hallucinations started shortly after his father died. In addition he realised he was growing old himself, and it looked very much like he wouldn't leave an heir.

The voices he was hearing immediately took over his entire life and are responsible for his bizarre delusions and psychotic behaviour.

Another symptom of his schizophrenia is his complete lack of emotions. His only purpose in life is obeying the voices, and nothing else matters - not even when others, including family members, are being hurt or get killed in the process.

PROSECUTOR: Thank you. - Your witness.

DEFENCE Dr. David, is it not true that you have published several papers describing religion as child abuse and asking for the ban of all religions?

DR. DAVID: No, I didn't go that far. What I have said was that the exposure of children to religion, in terms of indoctrination, is child abuse because it causes fear and feelings of guilt and worthlessness in the child. I have no objection to consenting adults practicing religion, as long as nobody else gets hurt or pestered.

DEFENCE: No further questions.

PROSECUTOR: The prosecution rests.

JUDGE: Defence?

DEFENCE: Abraham, is there anyone besides yourself who has seen or heard God or his messengers?

ABRAHAM: My late wife met the Lord and two of his angels, and my nephew Lot met the angels, too.

DEFENCE: On what occasion did you and your wife meet them?

ABRAHAM: They appeared to us to announce the birth of Isaac and the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah.

DEFENCE: I call my first witness, Lot of Zoar.

CLERK: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

LOT: So help me God.

CLERK: We'll see about that.

DEFENCE: Lot, have you ever seen a messenger of God?

LOT: Yes, I have.

DEFENCE: On what occasion?

LOT: Before Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed, the two angels who had visited Abraham came to see me and my family.

DEFENCE: How long have you known the defendant?

LOT: All my life.

DEFENCE: Does your uncle strike you as somebody who has hallucinations and mistreats others?

LOT: God no!

DEFENCE: How would you describe his personality?

LOT: He is a god-fearing, gentle, generous, unselfish and just person.

DEFENCE: Has he ever helped you in difficult situations?

LOT: On several occasions. When he went to Egypt to escape the famine, he took me along. And when King Chedorlaomer defeated and plundered Sodom with his allies and took me and others hostage, my uncle single-handedly raised an army and freed me.

DEFENCE: You described Abraham as being generous. Can you give us an example?

LOT: When we lived between Bethel and Ai, our herdsmen had constant quarrels because there wasn't enough grassland for the both of us. So he suggested that we part ways, and he asked me to choose which way I wanted to go, telling me that he would go the other.

DEFENCE: Your witness.

PROSECUTION: Lot, you told us you were visited by two angels of your god. How do you know these men were angels? Did they have wings?

LOT: Of course not, but when you meet an angel, you just know.

PROSECUTION: 'You just know...' - Where did I hear that before? We shall leave it to the jury to decide how convincing that argument is.

When you invited the two men into your house, you had a crowd gathering outside, hadn't you?

DEFENCE: Objection! This is irrelevant to the case.

PROSECUTION: Your Honour, Lot has been questioned as a character witness, and I wish to shed some light on his own character.

JUDGE: Objection overruled. Answer the question.

LOT: Yes, the men of Sodom had gathered and demanded that I hand over the visitors.

PROSECUTION: For what purpose?

LOT: To sexually assault them.

PROSECUTION: How did you react?

LOT: I refused them.

PROSECUTION: And when they insisted?

LOT: I still refused them.

PROSECUTION: And what did you offer them instead?

LOT: I didn't offer anything.

PROSECUTION: Lot, is it not true that you offered them to have their way with your daughters instead?


JUDGE: Answer the question.

LOT (very quiet): Yes.

PROSECUTION: And why did you do that?

LOT: The two men were my guests, I was responsible for them.

PROSECUTION: So it was your judgment that two grown-up magic men with supernatural powers were more dependent on your protection than your two virgin daughters?

LOT: But they're only women.

PROSECUTION: The same women...

Unrest amongst the audience.


JUDGE: Order in the court!

PROSECUTION: The same women whose children you fathered a few years later, aren't they?

LOT: I was drunk that night...

PROSECUTION: No further questions.

DEFENCE: I call Eliezer to the stand.

CLERK: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?


DEFENCE: Eliezer, you are Abraham's longest-serving employee. What is your position?

ELIEZER: I'm his steward, Sir.

DEFENCE: How does he treat you?

ELIEZER: Very well, Sir.

DEFENCE: How would you describe him as an employer?

ELIEZER: Oh, Master is very kind and generous, Sir.

DEFENCE: Has he ever acted in a way that seemed uncaring, unfeeling or even insane?

ELIEZER: Oh no, Sir.

DEFENCE: Are you grateful to be able to work for him?

ELIEZER: Oh yes, Sir. He has led me to God, and he has shown me my place as a slave.

DEFENCE: Your witness.

PROSECUTION: Eliezer, your master once sent you to Aram-naharaim to find a bride for Isaac from his family, didn't he?

ELIEZER: Yes, Sir, he did.

PROSECUTION: Was he not afraid that you might be tempted to seek freedom and flee?

ELIEZER: Oh no, Sir. He knows that I am completely loyal to him. Also, running away would have brought on the wrath of God.

PROSECUTION: Did he ever whip you?

ELIEZER: Only when I deserved it, Sir.

PROSECUTION: No further questions.

DEFENCE: The defence rests.

JUDGE: Your closing statements, please.

PROSECUTION: Your Honour, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I am confident that after this trial there will be no doubt in your minds as to the guilt of Abraham of Hebron.

In this man you will find not a spark of morality, not a drop of human kindness, and not a grain of common sense. He has created religions that have killed billions, and which over three millennia have committed genocide, warfare, homicide, child abuse, torture, slavery, racism and all other kinds of atrocities.

You heard the defence claim that this man gave us morality. When I look at mankind, I can safely say that our society, though far from being perfect, has a high level of moral standards - not because of this man, but despite him!

Could you really believe that this Charles Manson of the Bronze Age who married his half-sister and loaned her out for profit, who displaced, abandoned, abused and almost killed his children, who kept and mistreated slaves and forced his male slaves to have their foreskins cut off, often with fatal consequences, has supplied the moral framework for our society?
Take a look at the supposedly holy scriptures based on the teachings of this brute, and you will find that in most countries it is impossible follow them to the letter, simply because they contradict the most basic human rights by giving instructions as how to butcher those of different races and different beliefs and how to stone disobedient children to death.

Now the defence counsel may try to convince you that Abraham's god wasn't able to be nicer to people in those days because he hadn't sacrificed his own son yet. Ladies and gentlemen, I am sure that you are all very nice persons, and I bet that none of you ever sacrificed a child. In fact, someone sacrificing their child, be it by killing or indoctrination, is quite a nasty person, and I am not willing to make allowances when it comes to the moral standards of deities.

For three thousand years children have grown up in fear of divine punishment and even Hell, feeling guilty not only about their own actions but also the actions of those who supposedly first disobeyed Abraham's god, and considering themselves worthless because they are told that without this god they are nothing. Trusting their parents who foster these beliefs in them, they grow up taking them for real, and then, not knowing any better, pass the virus on to the next generation.

Some people say I have no faith, but that is not entirely true. I do have faith in the values of society and the moral integrity of the human community. I do have faith in our legal system, and I do have faith in you, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, to reach the verdict this trial calls for. Thank you.

DEFENCE: Your Honour, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it is a sad and shocking sight to see a man on trial for obeying God. Abraham of Hebron is one of the Lord's most faithful servants, and he has complete trust in him.

God, who has created the world and mankind, has authority over everything. Because it is he who has given life to a person, he has the right to take it away as well. Everybody is in his hands.
When God asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac, he only claimed what was his. And after all, he even decided to spare the boy and give him back to his parents. As a result of his obedience, God has blessed Abraham more than anyone else in the world.

The example of Abraham has inspired billions to lead a just and god-fearing life and put all their trust in the Lord. Here is a man who obeys God without questioning, no matter how much he asks of him!

You have met his servant Eliezer who is the perfect mirror image of his master. Just as Abraham obeys God unquestioningly and unselfishly and accepts his authority and punishments, so does Eliezer accept them from Abraham, and both will get their reward in Paradise.

Everything this man is accused of he has done because the highest authority and creator of all, God Almighty, has told him to do so. And just like this court will judge Abraham today, God will judge everyone in this courtroom soon, and I have a feeling the verdicts will be very similar. Thank you.

JUDGE: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, you have heard the case and the evidence. You will now retire to the jury room to deliberate and return when you have agreed on a verdict.

Muffled voices while the jury deliberates.

BAILIFF: This court is now in session, everybody rise.

All rise.

BAILIFF: Be seated.

All sit.

JUDGE: Has the jury reached a verdict?

FOREMAN: We have, Your Honour.

JUDGE: Will the defendant please rise and face the jury?

What is your verdict?

FOREMAN: We find the defendant guilty as charged.

ABRAHAM: You'll burn in Hell!


JUDGE: Order in the court!

Abraham of Hebron, for the vile and evil crimes you have committed, I sentence you to spend the rest of your life in a high security prison, without chance of parole.

ABRAHAM: God will destroy you all, you hear? You all are cursed!

DEFENCE (hushed): I told you we should have pleaded insanity.


ABRAHAM: The Lord will set me free, and he will burn all of you alive!

CLERK: Take him out of here.

6253 RT (2012 CE) by Frank L. Ludwig